A moment of gratitude and reflection before the journey continues
As I look ahead at the long road of unknown territories, readying myself for yet another new era in my life, there are a few things I wanted to share and get off my chest.
This website has been the best platform for me to express my thoughts over the years, raw and uncensored. These thoughts and opinions have ranged from political and environmental to creative and deeply personal, so it feels like the best place to bare my heart and soul to whomever out there might choose to read it.
First of all I want to thank everyone who has stuck by me over the years, particularly the last three that I have spent living in London. Whether it be friends and family, or the warmth of strangers who have read my work and been touched and influenced by it; this love has been my own inspiration to keep going – as well as my armour in times of conflict.
I’ve learnt a lot of lessons over the last few years or so since moving to London, many of which I expressed through my latest book, Oracles under City Lights. It took a lot of adjustment, leaving a life I built and cared for three years prior, to set off solo and find a path that was all my own.
To leave behind foundations, some secure and some not as secure as I’d hoped. To chase my dreams and pursue my ambitions, despite any negative whispers I could hear in the distance. To not live in the shadow of any other, but to step out into the vulnerable foreground – open for question and critique. I realised (or perhaps remembered) how it is fine to be an underdog, to not have to hang in any circuit in any part of town to be fulfilled.
I learned to fill my life with light in other ways, such as surrounding myself with positive energy and people who truly have my back. To stay true to myself and my art, no matter how stormy the weather gets or how many people just don’t ‘get it’. To rise up to every challenge and restriction and fight harder for the things I believe in and the people that I love.
To not focus on pleasing the masses, or gaining the approval of everyone I meet. Anyone who has been to university and left it will understand how it’s so much more significant to have less people around you, but to ensure they are the people who truly have your back. I love my friends deeply and can’t thank them enough.
Most of all I remembered my spirituality, an aspect of my heart and soul I had become so far removed from over the years. Getting back in tune with this was like an inner awakening, a rebirth of the most required kinds. This meant that no matter how noisy the city got at times, or how much I fought to break into my career; I managed to tune everything out and feel humbled. Well, at least some of the time…
So looking back over the last three years (and even further), I will keep all of these lessons, experiences and memories firmly by my side to guide me through what comes next. To act as a compass when I’m lost or afraid and remind me of the strength I know lies within.
I am someone that has always craved change. I have a thirst for adventure and longing to experience as many things, people and places I can in the very limited (and precious) time I have on this earth. This is why I have chosen to leave London behind and start fresh, once again.
There is an expression that says: “When a man is tired of London, he is tired of life.” As much as I agree you could never tire of London, it’s multifaceted and always has something to teach you, I don’t believe that choosing to sail outside of its walls means you are tired of life. It is this mentality I have always fought so hard against, ever since spending my younger years in a small country town.
I never want to feel so trapped in a bubble, like the people living under the dome in Stephen King’s novel. The world is vast, complex and colourful. There are so many things to discover, one person simply couldn’t do it all in a lifetime. But surely he can try…?
So I am ready for the next chapter. For all the exciting, scary and unpredictable challenges that lie ahead. For every obstacle and fork in the road, this is what keeps life interesting. This is what keeps us learning. To not change, but instead to grow.
I am truly in a content place in my life, more than ever before. I know who I am and that there are people who love me and have my back, just as I have theirs. I have nothing to prove to anyone, not even myself. Success comes in many guises, but ultimately everyone’s end goal is happiness. And this is something that can only come from within.
All that I can wish for is the same for you. Whether you are my friend, my family or a stranger who cares or cares not for my words. Follow what it is that you love, don’t give up until you have achieved your ambitions. Set the bar high, and then reach higher.
Not everyone is going to agree with you along the way – and this is fine. No matter how you choose to express yourself or what you fight for, don’t be afraid to push buttons and to defy. Don’t be afraid to carve your own path and walk it with confidence. Be an underdog and a leader. You will enrage some, but you will inspire others. This is a risk, in my eyes, that is so worth taking.
Join me in this next exciting chapter of my journey and we will withstand the test of time, as we always have.
After note: It’s important for me to take time between each project to experience life and gain inspiration for what will come next. This is why I am taking an undefined hiatus from updating this site.
I will of course still be writing during this time, as writing is as essential to me as breathing. I’m writing a lot lately, feeling very inspired and excited to complete my next project – which is my debut novel.
It’s been a long time coming, I’ve picked it up and put it down a lot over the last few years, but I’m finally ready to see it through and share what I’ve been working on. Quality must come over quantity, which is why I will never just rush something out I am not truly happy with. I will be splitting the book into three smaller novellas, which I aim to release digitally before the complete novel is published physically.
I look forward to what the next chapter of this book called life will bring…
Love, light and constant movement